Marriage Advice

Today's advice comes from Andrea Talbot, owner of Signature Ceremonies:

"Talk about everything. Talk, talk, talk. Only through communication will you be able to determine if your partner is marriage material.

Marry someone with whom you share love, respect, joy, personal values and future plans. Don't marry for physical attraction or money or family pressure or pregnancy or insurance or personal insecurities.

Don't marry because you've been together "long enough" and everyone says it's time to take the next step. These are the marriages that become the divorce statistics. Marriage isn't a magic bandaid that solves all your relationship problems. You and your partner will wake up the day after your wedding the same people you were the day before, and any unresolved issues you had previously will now be magnified tenfold.

Half the battle in making a good marriage is choosing the right partner. The other half is keeping your commitment primary and renewing and strengthening your love everyday. When kids, careers, illness, layoffs, aging parents and all the business of life weighs on you, find refuge in each other. Remember to connect with your partner and focus on your marriage. Have fun together! Spend time together! Share each others' secrets! Laugh!

If you cautiously and consciously choose a good partner, and you both commit to making your relationship a priority, you will have a lasting and loving marriage."

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Marriage Advice

Today's advice comes from online users on About.Com, who share the best marriage advice they ever received:

• "If I am unhappy with my husband about something, it stands to reason there are things about me he is unhappy about. We need to work together." ~ BT
• "Don't fight over money because there is never enough to go around anyway." ~ s91601
• "For women: Do not expect your husband to change after marriage. For men: Do not expect your wife to not change. : )" ~ Data10000
• "A quote from the Bible: What God has yoked together, let no man tear apart." ~ Donnamaria65
• "From my MIL: "Marriage is forever. You have to stick it out no matter how miserable you are." ~ Michele
• "The best marriage advice I received was from my grandmother: Marriage is not always 50/50. Some days you will wake up and may have to give 90% and your spouse will give 10%. Other days you may wake up and give 25% and your husband will have to put in the 75%. I never thought of this before but it is so true." ~ Meme

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Marriage Advice

Today's advice comes from Sadie, who says:

"Try to dwell on your partner's positive traits instead of what bugs you. Also, make sure you pick a good guy. Sometimes I think the only reason my marriage is good is because I married a good guy."

Thanks, Sadie!

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Marriage Advice from Tom & Nancy Osborne

Some of you brides may have picked up on the fact that here at NWD, we're Husker-obsessed. Ok, ok...I must admit that really it's ME that is Husker-obsessed. Since I get to write the blog and it's now officially Husker football season, I think it's fair to say you may be seeing more Husker-themed posts over the next few months.

Today we're lucky enough to have some advice from Tom and Nancy Osborne on how they've made their marriage last. Here are a few valuable tidbits:

"Nobody gets to where they are without hard work. A marriage commitment must be intentional; it doesn't just happen." -Nancy

"The instability of marriage is quite distressing. Young people should think it through before making the commitment. Don't ignore the glaring areas of conflict and don't go into the marriage expecting the other person to change." -Tom

"Our marriage has endured because we have a common set of values, a shared spiritual faith, and we see the world through a similar lens." -Tom

"Everyday communication is so important. I've learned the hard way that hiding your feelings can be detrimental to handling issues in marriage."-Nancy

"Communication needs to occur without television, children, or phone interruptions, and it needs to be one-on-one." -Nancy

"Nancy laughs easily and celebrates life most all of the time, which influences me to keep a balanced perspective." -Tom

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Marriage Advice

Back by popular demand, here are some more nuggets of wisdom from children on love and marriage.


"No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're stuck with."
- Kirsten, age 10


"No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married."
- Freddie, age 6


"Twenty-three is the best age to get married because you know the person FOREVER by then."
- Camille, age 10

"The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry them & have kids with them. It's the right thing to do."
- Howard, age 8


"It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them."
- Anita, age 9

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Marriage Advice

Today's marriage advice is from the sage minds of children. Here are a few sweet tips on how to make your love endure.

"Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if she looks like a truck." -Ricky, Age 10

"Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work." -Tom, Age 7

"Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash." -Randy, Age 8

"You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming." -Alan, Age 10

"It gives me a headache to think about that stuff. I'm just a kid. I don't need that kind of trouble." -Will, Age 7

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Marriage Advice

Today's advice comes from Jenny, who has been married for 6 years:

"I'm sure many have heard the saying 'don't go to bed angry', but it really is true. If you go to bed angry and wake up the next morning and don't talk about it or act like nothing happened, those disagreements get pushed down and resentment builds. In my opinion, this is one of the key ways that people 'grow apart', which is such an often-used reason for divorce.

"Talk things out! If you need some time to cool off, fine, but make sure you address your problems head-on and fight fair. There won't be any need to play dirty or bring up old issues if you are always working on yourselves and talking about things rationally after arguments. (I know this is easier said than done, but it is possible if you both make a commitment to try hard.)"

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Sunday Series: Marriage Advice

Today's marriage advice comes from Renae (who just celebrated her 15th anniversary with her husband). She offers up some counsel for avoiding fights about the in-laws:

"Always speak kindly about your spouse's family, just as your spouse should always speak kindly about your family. You each love your families and it hurts to hear anyone speak negatively about them. And know that you will stand on peaks and walk through valleys, but as long as you do both of these side-by-side, all will turn out well!"

Congrats on the anniversary, Renae! Hopefully 15 years from now we will have many brides who read this blog sharing their own advice for a successful marriage.

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Marriage Advice

Here's my advice (from a self-professed "fat-girl", married mother of 2, with 2 dogs as well): I am super anal and I hate to have anything out of place. But I try to remind myself that there are so many more important things than a clean kitchen.

It's so easy to get frustrated with a fiance/husband who doesn't pick up after himself. Take it from one who's been there: As irritating as those things might be (and as important as it is for your man to respect you and pick up after himself), you will not care about those things in the long run. Love him for who he is, slob or not, and appreciate the effort he makes for you. If his messiness really drives you crazy and he's not making an effort, STOP PICKING UP! It's common sense. Trust me, it worked with my 3-year-old. He will clean up if you aren't enabling him. It's caveman mentality.

Most importantly, love him and have a servant attitude towards him. It may sound dated and sexist, but if you have a loving and generous heart towards your husband, it will pay off in dividends.

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Important Notice!

Due to Center Stage closing abruptly...if you had a stylists there, here's where you can find some of them:

Dana P, Melissa B, Becky B, Brandi Z, Sara K, and Brianna T are now all at Utopia.
Becky M, Liz O, and Kristin C are at Von Hair.
Paula H is at J.C. Penney's.

Also, Advanced Aesthetics and Tranquility Spas are honoring Center Stage's gift cards.

A special thanks to Cali Hlavac with A Sound Impression for providing this information. NWD is so blessed to have wonderful vendors who truly care about the well-being of their brides!

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New Series: Marriage Advice

So often it is easy to get caught up in the wedding preparations without consideration for the reason: marriage. Starting today, NWD is beginning a Sunday series of advice from married women (and men!). All submissions will remain anonymous and can be emailed to holly@neweddingday.com. It can be something as simple as reminding wives to avoid picking fights over dirty socks on the floor to something deeper and more complex like dealing with a spouse's addiction. In a culture of divorce, NWD wants to promote the importance of lasting marriages and help all our lovely brides start their marriage off on the right foot!

Today's advice comes from Sally*:
"Make sure you have the same ideas about how you want to raise your children - what kind of discipline you want to use, how many kids you want to have, what church you want to raise them in, etc. It will prevent a lot of fights if you are on the same page with parenting."

*Name changed.

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