Choosing your Bridesmaids

And you thought finding the groom was hard! Sometimes picking your bridesmaids (and handling the drama that can come with it) can be exhausting. Here are some tips to help you along the way:

Remember that it's your day. Having 10 bridesmaids might be pushing it, but if you have lots of close friends and you can't bear the thought of leaving any of them out, include them all. You don't want to regret missing anyone on your big day.

Use the 10-year test. Think hard about who you will still be in touch with in 10 years. Chances are, using this test will be an eye-opener if you're struggling to narrow your list.

Consider their own personal lives. Is one of your friends going through a really difficult time financially or emotionally? Often, women are so honored to be asked to stand up at a wedding, they will say yes even if they really aren't capable of handling the responsibility at that point in time. If you have a friend like this, it may be most considerate to ask her to do a reading at the ceremony or something else that doesn't require the time and money commitment of being a bridesmaid.

Be honest. You may face the difficult task of leaving out a friend you just don't feel close to anymore. In this case, ignoring it or not acknowledging that she may feel slighted is probably not a good idea. Take her out for coffee and explain the situation to her. As awkward as it may be, it shows her that at least you care enough about your friendship to take the time to talk to her about it. It may be uncomfortable, but if she reacts badly, it will probably only confirm that she wasn't the right person to stand up in your wedding anyway.

*Photo courtesy of Colleen Dustin Photography.